The part of us we want to transform is the part that wants to be accepted
Everyone who is working on themselves, understanding their beliefs and trying to make peace with it, knows how difficult it is to get there.
Yesterday I published my first podcast in which I talked about 2 different autopilot modes we’re running on day in and day out. If you haven’t already, you can listen to it here.
The mode that stands in our way is driven by deep-rooted beliefs we have built in our childhood. It affects the way we behave and how we live our relationships. This includes the relationship we maintain with ourselves.
One of my most loyal subscribers left a comment on my podcast saying:
“I am doing therapy myself, kind of low profile actually, and it’s so tiring to be filled up your entire life with false beliefs and then the rest of your life trying to get rid of them”
Everyone who is working on themselves, understanding their beliefs and trying to make peace with it, knows this feel.
Over the last couple of months, I’ve gone through an extensive process that showed me once more:
“The part of us we want to change is the part that wants to be accepted”
The challenge we face in accepting our past selves and their beliefs is the time it takes to transition from our mind down to our heart.
We understand intellectually what it means to accept, but this one-dimensional understanding has to settle and become 3 dimensional. (Mind, Heart and Intuition).
For the mind we can tick it off. It’s the entrance door. We understand quickly and from there we can work and bring it down to our heart.
And once we got to feel what we understood intellectually at first; the magic happens.
We embody the whole experience. It becomes part of our intuition where we sense the truth.
Also known as the “A-ha!” Effect.
It’s the way we come to wisdom.
The simplest example to explain this process is when a parent tells his child to not touch the flame of the candle, because it hurts.
The “A-Ha!” effect, however, will only happen when it touches the flame. It feels, and it knows (3 dimensional) the truth.
And this state of wisdom is required for us to let go.
Letting go of the false beliefs we formed in our childhood is a process that takes far more time than the instant wisdom we gain by touching a flame.
The following has changed the entire game for me and I hope it will for you as well:
The issue I faced was my excessive focus on trying to internalize this intellectual understanding.
Trying to get a grip on my younger-self, made me feel exhausted and desperate. Those moments when you wish you could remain unconscious of it. It just seems too much and unpassable.
Once more….
“The part of us we want to change is the part that wants to be accepted”
Let’s forget for a moment our younger selves who have built these beliefs. It’s way too long ago and out of reach.
Instead, let’s embrace who and how we are today.
It all starts with the part of us we want to change. It is present and within our reach.
Finding love for this part is the key. To emotionally understand why this part exists and to cultivate forgiveness.
Everything will unfold and settle automatically the more we love and enjoy ourselves in the present.
We cannot be more aware as we already are. We know it and the embodiment is on its way. The more we try to push it through, the more we maintain resistance and the longer it takes.
The more we’re present, the more we create distance to our problems, including our beliefs we carried for so long. This space is required for the process to unfold and the magic to happen.
It ultimately allows you to come closer to the root; the flame.
We shouldn't forget that without this space, we would pass on the things we can already enjoy today.
And to support this…
I'd like to invite you to read “A walk in the woods”, an article I came across yesterday.
It takes you on a journey through nature with breathtaking pictures and his incredible talent for describing every detail of his discoveries, making you feel as if you're actually there.
It blew my mind, and I stayed at peace knowing this is what it means to be present. I hope it will help you as well to get a bit closer to the now.
Thank you very much
for this marvelous piece. I’ll keep it in mind on my walks and try to look at things the way you do.Enjoy the moment,
Patrick
Incredibly helpful, Patrick. Thank you. I've felt a very deep resistance to certain parts of myself lately and I have some pretty bad self-talk that shuns these parts of myself. You know, the shy socially awkward side that I wish could just talk to people with more confidence. Your quote “The part of us we want to change is the part that wants to be accepted” is very helpful and eye-opening for me. I have to accept that part of myself. Only then will I have a better relationship with it. Am I getting it right?
😊🙏